Reflections on Leadership and Learning

New year, same readerly life! I started off 2024 with some incredible reads! I’ve also decided to be generous with my four and five star ratings, because these records are really just for me. If I loved a book while reading it, or if I can’t stop thinking about the story or the characters after I’ve done, or if it impacts me at all, then it’s getting a good rating. This month I read:

• Banyan Moon by Thao Thai – I received this beautiful book as a Christmas gift from my lovely cousin (thanks JJ!). This was a gorgeous story about three generations of Vietnamese women, alternating between each of their storylines. We meet Minh, the grandmother, and learn of her life in Vietnam. Minh’s dauther, Huong, is living in Florida as we learn her back story. Ann, the granddauther, we meet when she must return to Florida upon her grandmother’s death. There, she and her mother grapple with the house full of their memories, their tense relationships, and everything unsaid between them. I loved these women and the challenges they have overcome.
• Yellowface by R. F. Kuang – Thanks to my cousin for this book as well! I had heard of this a lot last year, but hadn’t picked it up yet. I read this is one day – it was a propulsive thriller that I could not put down. What we know is that when the young, talented, Chinese American writer Athena dies unexpectedly, her friend June steals her work and publishes it as her own. What follows is a look into the dark side of the publishing industry, a look at white supremacy, cultural appropriation, and bias, and a look at what individuals will do to succeed. This was a beautifully written, dark story.
• Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin – This book was so popular last year I saw it everywhere! I thought it sounded interesting, but had heard mixed reviews so I waited a long time before I picked it up. I found it delightful! Sam and Sadie are life-long friends who develop video games together, with the producing support of their friend Marx. Along the way, we learn about living with disabilities, living as a mixed race person in America, living through grief, different kinds of love and how people express or don’t express love, and so much more. I thought this was a beautiful journey and I loved the characters!
• Clean Air by Sarah Blake – When I first hear the premise of this book described on the Currently Reading podcast, I knew I would love it! In this dystopian, cli-fi thriller, the setting is the future after all of the pollen has made the air unsafe to breathe. Characters are beyong just wearing masks, and are living in safe bubbles of purified air. We meet Izabel and her family right as a serial killer appears, the first of it’s kind since The Turning of the air. Izabel gets involved in the search for the killer and this a fast-paced thriller until the end!
• Killers of the Flower Moon: The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann [audiobook] – I heard about this true crime look into history a lot last year, and was interested to read about the beginning of the FBI. I listened to this, and I would not recommend the audiobook, as this is a dry book full of literally hundreds of different names. While the writing was dry, the story was fascinating. The Osage tribe of Oklahoma were the richest people around in the 1900’s when oil struck. The history of this tribe is beyond depressing, and is truly a systemic killing of a large group of people all for money and power. I learned so much about the fact that these rich Indigenous people were required to have a White man serve as their overseer of their finances. This practice led to white men systematically finding ways to murder people in order to transdfer their finances and land to themselves. There were brutal crimes, poisoning, and hidden webs of deception, where is where the birth of the FBI came in. I’m glad I know more about this reign of terror and this awful aspect of history.
• High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out by Amanda Ripley – Thank you to Andree for loaning me this incredible book! I loved reading this, as it was a learning experience with each new story. This journalist takes us through the study of conflict, mediation, breaking down barriers and walls, and how to get beyond conflict. The examples were so specific and different, from a local city council election to a gang member in an inner city to a rebel in Columbia. The final chapter outlined an exchange program where a group of liberal Jews from New York City met with a group of conservative correctional officers from Michigan. They stayed in each others’ houses, discussed hard topics, and the main goal was to be curious, but not to change peoples’ minds. I could literally feel my heart beat accelerating as I read that chapter, imagining how I would feel to have those conversations. So many of these examples demonstrated the critical importance of listening to people, truly listening to their stories, their concerns, and their wishes, without trying to impact an outcome. One of my favorite quotes stuck out because it included my word of 2024: “One of the burdens of high conflict is that it doesn’t allow for delight, for these little moments of joy. Curiosity is a prerequisite to delight. And it’s impossible to feel curious in the Tar Pits (high conflict)”. I highly recommend to book to all humans wanting to have better interactions with other humans.
• First Lie Wins by Ashley Elston – I usually love the Book of the Month mystery/ thriller picks and this was no exception. I enjoyed this fast-paced mystery that felt almost propulsive enought to be considered a thriller. We meet Evie, living a perfect life with her boyfriend. But then we quickly learn that Evie is an alias for a woman who works for an unknown secret man who assigns her jobs that require new identities and bad deeds. As Evie’s life unravels, we are there on the roller coaster with her. This was fun and full of questionable characters!
• The Heaven and Earth Grocery Store by James McBride – This is the January book for my Secret Stuff Book Club with Laura Tremaine. I read two of McBride’s past books and appreciate his literary style and the way he creates rich, flawed characters. In this story we meet a group of Jewish people and a group of African American people who live in the same area of town. Chonda is a beloved member of the neighborhood, as she runs the local grocery store and never keeps track of what people owe her. She is the bridge between the two cultures, building community around her store. We meet lots of oher important and side characters along the way, and follow a few misadventures as they fight for equality and basic human rights. This is a story about community and found family.
• Better the Blood by Michael Bennett – I heard Elizabeth Barnhill recommend this book on Currently Reading and knew I would love it. This is a crime mystery that takes place in Auckland, New Zealnad (on my travel bucket list!), and is at the heart of the trauma from colonization. The Māori people lost their land, their homes, their dignity, through colonization, and some are determined to get it back. Our main character Hana is both a Māori and a policewoman, struggling with both identities, when the murders begin. As she works to solve the case, she is confronted with her own past and the past of her people. This was a gripping, propulsive thriller that touched on the real history of New Zealand (thought a fictionalized version), and I LOVED it!
• The Defense Eddie Flynn #1 by Steve Cavanagh – Last year I read the fourth book in this series, because I heard it could stand alone. I loved it, and decided I wanted to go back to the beginning of the series and get to know the lawyer Eddie Flynn from his origin story. This was a fast-paced legal thriller that involved the Russian Mob, a lot of threats of violence, and some slick law work. I LOVED it!
• Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano – After I read Hello Beautiful by this author last year, I knew I wanted to read more by her. This book was beautifully heartbreaking and yet sweet and soulful and hard to read and simply gorgeous. I can’t say enough about how much I enjoyed diving into the life of Edward. I don’t want to spoil the plot, but if you like a bittersweet literary journey, take this one! [Edward’s mother, father and brother die in a plane crash where he, at age 12, is the lone survivor. He is taken in by his aunt and uncle. The next door neighbor, Shay, becomes his friend and lifelong through years of depression and grief and love.
• Ordinary Grace by William Kent Krueger – For about a year I’ve been hearing about William Kent Krueger’s books and I finally got this one from my library. What a beautiful, heartbreaking, bittersweet tale. We are in small town Minnesota in 1961, a summer full of deaths. With each new death, Frank and his younger brother Jack follow a mysterial trail to figure out what is going on, surrounded by adults drowning in their own problems and unaware of all that the kids are seeing and hearing in this sad summer. I loved this reading experience.
• The Path Between the Seas: The Creation of the Panama Canal, 1870-1914 by David McCoulloug [audiobook] – I decided to read this book because I am traveling to Panama in March. I thought, because it’s nonfiction, that I would enjoy the audiobook. What I appreciated was how much I learned about what it took to build the Panama Canal, how France started it and how the US took over the process after a serious conflict, and how many thousands of lives (of mostly BIPOC men) were lost due to dangerous conditions, malaria, yellow fever, and more. What I didn’t appreciate as much was the extensive details that were provided for EVERYTHING. I would have enjoyed an abridged version, but this was basically a history class all about the canal. I am looking forward to seeing it in person later this year.

Favorite Books of the Month

Fiction: Ordinary Grace, Dear Edward, Better the Blood, Banyan Moon, The Defense & Clean Air were all 5 STAR books for me!

Nonfiction: High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out

It seems anti-climatic to post what I read in December at this point, but this is a record for me. This month I read:

• Happiness Falls by Angie Kim – I read and loved Miracle Creek by this author, and was excited to read her newest book after I heard Laura Tremaine talk about it on 10 Things to Tell You. This was such a great read and so propulsive! The story begins with a father gone missing. Mia, the only daughter, narrates the story. She introduces us to her twin brother John, their younger brother Eugene, who has both Autism and Angelman’s Disorder, which leaves him unable to communicate with his family, and their mother. As we get to know the family, the mystery of what happened to their father becomes more intriguing and more concerning. This was a beautiful tale about family, communication, language, people who speak more than one language, and people who communicate using different methods than we are used to. I LOVED this story!
• The Wind Knows My Name by Isabel Allende [audiobook] – Allende writes beautiful stories, with descriptive, vivid language. This sad and yet hopeful story starts in Vienna in 1938, as young Samuel’s Jewish family deals with the Nazi takeover of Vienna. Then we flashforward to meet Anita, a young girl who fled El Salvador with her mother in 2019 to come to America, where they were separated at the border. We learn more about both Samuel and Anita as we live through their troubles with them. This was sad, a heartbreaking reminder of horrible atrocities done to humans in our past. It was also beautifully poignant and sweet, full of other rich characters and hope.
• XOXO Cody: An Opinionated Homosexual’s Guide to Self Love, Relationships, and Tactful Pettiness by Cody Rigsby [audiobook] – I have only had a Peloton since April, but I love Cody Rigsby’s classes. He is funny, goofy, sarcastic, and such a good time! His book is just like him – full of fun stories about him and his life, mixed with serious elements of a challenging childhood, and details of his rise to Peloton fame, his time on Dancing with the Stars, and his dating excapades. This was a delightful audiobook!
• Blood Sisters by Vanessa Lillie – This was a fast-paced thriller that kept me interested and by the end I couldn’t turn the pages fast enough! We meet Syd just as she is forced to return to her hometown in Oklahoma, in Cherokee land, to help with a missing persons case. Then we learn that her sister is also missing. As Syd battles the demons that chased her away from town, she is forced to reckon with her past and her family, all while fighting for the lives and rights of Indigenous people, and all of the LGBTQIA+ girls who go missing without anyone caring all over. This is a sad and compelling tale based too much on facts from our history.
• Everyone in My Family Has Killed Someone by Benjamin Stevenson – I have heard a few podcasts discuss this book, as a funny mystery, and thought it would be a light read for the end of the year. It was light and it was silly-funny, but not my favorite kind of writing.The entire Cunningham family reunites for a family reunion just as one of the crew gets out of jail (for murder). As more people die during their icy reunion, we learn the deatils of the family’s crimes and misdemeanors in silly ways. The book is very meta, with the narrator talking to the reader throughout the book, and listing off rules of a mystery in a joking way. It was a little too silly for me, with too many flawed characters that I didn’t care enough about.
• Fireworks Every Night by Beth Raymer – I received this book for Christmas from my cousin (Thanks JJ!). She had read it and it was a perfect vacation read. We meet CC in two timelines: her childhood growing up in a tumultuous family in Florida, and as she is newly married to a very wealthy man from a wealthy family in Connecticut. CC struggles to find herself in both timelines, and we meet her family and learn their sad stories along the way. This was a beautifully written story about some sad topics.
• Criminal Mischief (Stone Barrington #60) by Stuart Woods – I only have a few more Stuart Woods books left to read (he passed away recently), so I am reading them sparingly. I used this as a palete cleanser after a darker book, while on vacation. This is an easy read, because the main characters, Stone and Dino, have been with me for 60 books now! In this story, Stone is chasing a pyramid scheme con artist around the world, flying his jet from NY to Hawaii to the Middle East and back, helping the FBI chase down this criminal.
• Cold People by Tom Rob Smith – This felt like one of my cli-fi books, even though it doesn’t really fit this category; it’s more a sci-fi mystery. In this, all people of the world must get to Antarctica in a short period of time. From there, so much happens to the world. I don’t want to spoil anything, but this is an interesting study in human evolution, creativity, and what matters for a good life. I really enjoyed it!

Favorite Books of the Month

Fiction–> Happiness Falls

Nonfiction–> XOXO Cody: An Opinionated Homosexual’s Guide to Self Love, Relationships, and Tactful Pettiness

In November I had a nice balance of different fiction books as well as two nonfiction books and two audiobooks. This month I read:

• The Leftover Woman by Jean Kwok – This is a family drama narrated by two different women. Jasmine is a woman who has escaped a bad marriage in China and come to America to find the daughter taken away from her. She has to work awul jobs to pay off the smugglers who brought her here. Rebecca is a wealthy wife and editor who adopted a daugther from China, where she met her husband. As we get to know these two women, and Jasmine races to find her daugther, the wheels come off of everything and it’s a fast-paced thriller at the end. This was a look into adoption, China’s one child policy, and so much more.
• Mickey Chambers Shakes it Up by Charish Reid [audiobook] – This is a cheesy romance that was a simple palate cleanser in between harder-to-read books, and a quick listen on audio. Mickey is a woman trying to find her new path, as she takes a job as a bartender. The bar owner, Diego, is a widower with an attitude. These opposites quickly attract and fight and find their way together throughout this simple, entertaining story.
• Warrior Girl Unearthed by Angeline Boulley – I have loved Boulley ever since I heard her speak at a past Equity conference. I loved her first YA mystery and I loved this one as well! Her writing is beautiful, and she creates powerful young women who are warriors in their own right. She weaves details about the Indigenous culture into every part of her storytelling, from language to history to traditions. In this story we follow Perry and her friends through their summer internship, while Indigenous girls continue to go missing in their area. As Perry learns about the very true Native American Graves Protection Repatriation Act (NAGPRA), she struggles with how her ancestors remains are being treated by museums, tourist shops, and private “collectors”. She is empowered to do something as she learns more, uniting her friends in a dangerous adventure that was fast-paced and thrilling.
• The House in the Pines by Ana Reyes [audiobook] – While looking for an audiobook from my library, I stumbled upon this book, which was a Reese Witherspoon pick I had high hopes for. The first half of the story, as we get to know Maya in her present state and her past, I got sucked into the mystery of how her friend just fell over and died in front of a man Maya had been dating. When a sudden death of another young woman is caught on tape, with the same man present, Maya must confront her past and figure out what happened. Once some of the mystery was reveleaed, this was a big let down, both in storytelling and thriller aspects. I was disappointed with the ending.
• Land of Milk and Honey by C Pam Zhang – I love a good climate fiction story, that takes an element of climate change and accerlates it until we are a dystopian world struggling to survive without resources we are used to. In this case, a deep fog has taken over the world, so people no longer see sky or sunlight and crops go extinct. A young chef, struggling to make ends meet, is hired by an anonymous business man to come work on his hill, known as the Land of Milk and Honey, as he prepares to create a new world order. This chef doesn’t know what she is getting into, but she begins her job, begins to get to know her boss, his daugther and his patrons through her cooking. The writing style is very unique, with disjointed sentences and incomplete storylines jumping around, yet beautiful poetic language. This was a fascinating story to read.
• The Helsinki Affair by Anna Pitoniak – I picked this from Book of the Month because I usually love their thrillers. This was okay, but not great. Amanda is a young CIA agent, just as her father and grandfather were. She is stationed in a boring CIA area in Italy with nothing to do until a Russian man walks in with information. While Amanda belives him, her boss doesn’t and they sit on the information until it comes true. From there, Amanda is tasked with figuring out what the Russians are up to. We flash back to her father’s time in Helsinki, which connects to Amanda’s work in the present day. While this was a fun story line, there were too many characters introduced and switched around too often, and it was about 50 pages longer than it needed to be. With some tight editing this could be a very good mystery.
• Don’t Overthink It by Anne Bogel – I have enjoyed the What Should I Read Next podcast by Anne Bogel for a few years now. With every episode I am convinced that she has read every book EVER and am so impressed with the depth of her knowledge about books. I knew she had written a few books so I bought this one awhile ago and finally sat down to read it. This is a simple self-help book for those of us who are overthinkers – with anxious minds that cause us to keep thinking about decisions even after we’ve made them. While there was nothing earth-shattering in here, she provides good reminders about setting good habits for your mind and body, make certain decisions once so you never agonize over them again (love the rule that she always buys flowers at Trader Joe’s – I usually do too!), ask for help or outsource when you can, and treat yourself with kindness. This was a quick read and good for anyone who hasn’t yet developed habits for calming an overactive mind.
• Spare by Prince Harry and J.R. Moehringer (Ghost writer) [audiobook] – I have never been a huge fan of the royals. I have never watched a single episode of The Crown. But I do remember Princess Diana’s wedding and her horrible death. While I didn’t run out and get this book as soon as it was released, when I saw the audiobook available from my library I happily listened to it in a few short days. Though I don’t think I learned anything new about the events that led up to Harry and Meghan leaving the UK, I did learn a lot about Harry’s life, how disgusting the British press is, especially the paparrazzi, and how little control Harry had on any part of his life before he left it all behind. I hope that he and his entire family are safe and happy now.
• The Great Transition by Nick Fuller Googins – I LOVE a good cli-fi story! In this one, we meet Emi and her parents, who are living in Nuuk, which is the new Greenland after the great transition. After the earth is ruined by climate change, people fight to get to net zero and to rebuil safely and securley. Some people are happy to live in the new exisistence, while others continue to battle. Like all cli-fi books, the best and worst of humanity come out during tough times. People rally together in beautiful communities and also people do evil things. I liked Emi, depite her being a whiny, angsty teen, and her father was so lovable.

Favorite Books

Fiction: Warrior Girl Unearthed & The Great Transition

Nonfiction: Spare

Picture this: Your district launches a new initiative, after careful review, piloting, and thoughtful decision-making amongst a hard-working committee. The initiative is sent out into the universe with common language and visually appealing graphics to explain the work as the school year begins. People are trying on the new initiative – some are very happy and others may be grumbling, but they are trying. Leaders are checking in and supporting, and things are progressing until… late October hits. You know what late October in schools feels like? Everyone is tired. They haven’t had a long weekend in what feels like forever. Parent conferences are coming, the honeymoon period of good behavior is over, and everyone is feeling some added stress. And what about that shiny new initiative? Around late October, the grumblers are now yelling about how it’s not working, it was a big mistake, the students are bored, the staff hasn’t had enough time or support, and we need to stop it forever. The people who still support the new initiative get quiet. They are fearful of speaking up, speaking against their colleagues. The leader of the initiative is now doubting everything – did we move too fast, did we not offer enough support, was the system not ready for this, should we abandon this now before it gets worse?

In the scenario above, our leader has just entered the messy middle. This is the time in an initiative that that in research is often called the implementation dip. After a solid start, everything takes a dip, seems less successful. During this slump people are quick to want to abandon the initiative, to quit, to give up and move on to the next shiny object. But it is a mistake. Despite the challenges of the messy middle, and there are challenges, it is important for a leader to see through and know that good is coming on the other side. When you work in a system that is very responsive to teacher feedback, the messy middle may convince you that you have failed with an initiative. From experience pushing through and also quitting too soon, I can say that getting through the implementation dip is worth it when your initiative is impactful for teachers and student learning. Sometimes the messy middle can help you tweak a plan, to make it more teacher-friendly, or easier-to-use. It can also be a time to recognize that more time, resources or support are needed and to adjust your plans moving forward. But these options are better than quitting when it gets hard.

Another way to think about this is to study the graphic above. I believe I first saw this graphic in a class in my doctoral program, but can’t remember the specific source. I found this picture sourced here. According to this research, in order to have a successful change (i.e., a new initiative) you need vision, skills, incentives, resources, and an action plan. When you are missing one element, you will have different outcomes, none of which will be successful.

When you are in the middle of the messy middle, this is a great graphic to analyze alongside the feedback you are receiving. Teachers often say, “We don’t have enough time!” or “This isn’t working” or “The District didn’t roll this out well”. These are often coded ways of asking for more support, which means that skills need to be developed or incentives introduced or more resources shared. It’s hard for a professional to say something like, “I’m afraid I am failing” or “I don’t think I’m good enough to do this well”. Those are the worry above that are really a call for more skill development. Once I can pinpoint which area is missing in the messy middle, I can work with a team to plan a way forward that supports the people in the classrooms, doing the most important work with our students.

Next time you feel the implementation dip set in, take time to reflect on where you are and what your system needs moving forward. Don’t give up!

This post is part of a series called Explorations in Instructional Leadership. I plan to use this series to dive into some of the topics that are rising to the surface in my work, topics that I am researching for future study, and topics that impact student learning and pedagogy.

Introduction to Explorations in Instructional Leadership

The Science of Reading

Scope and Sequence

How to Teach Reading